Thursday, June 11, 2009


As I wander around the internet seeking out nubile young women who seek meaningful relationships with old arthritic, lung-busted, limp, smelly old men; I cannot help but notice the appalling lack of standards applied to what we jokingly refer to as the English language.  It seems that whilst I was indulging in a post luncheon nap, down in the side Garden of the Manor, the youngsters picked up on the ancient ritual of enforced mis-information directed towards the elder, more staid and stable segment of society. Their parents.  It's as if they are attempting to hide from us, the facts of their lives. It's as if their generation is the first to have discovered the pleasures of sex. ( of course, the Baby Boomers invented sex. ). It's as if they watched "Animal House" and mistook it for a drug hazed National Geographic documentary gone horribly bad. Binge drinking is so Last Century.  And why is everyone either bald or tomahawked? The guys, I mean. They can't all be ex-Rangers, can they?  

The dog is wrinkling her nose at my pathetic lump of flesh and attempting to kick dirt over me. I'll have to dig out and pour out some Devil Dog Chow for the little mutt. 


carrie said...

i would say no need to worry about language.

is it grammar? spelling?

anyway, language evolves constantly.
some languages die.

now, there's internet speak.

for some reason, it seems to be en vogue to use no capitalization or punctuation....

that's what the cool kids do, yeah.

sometimes it annoys me because i'm not sure why it's cool. maybe later, it will be More Interesting to write in complete, properly punctuated sentences... just for rebellions sake.

Reverend Lowell said...

Oh yeah -as the WHO said : the kids are alright.
I remember doing the same things with language: the code words etc. Growing up in The Time of the Beatles, we got exposed to rhyming slang, and stuff like "Grotty" = Grotesque. So yeah my daughter has begun to speak English again!